Month: December 2023
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Why are elevator jokes the funniest?
Why are elevator jokes the funniest? They work on all levels!
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If you give someone a late present…
If you give someone a late present… does that make it a past?
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I was at the public swimming pool today and decided to have a sneaky piss in the deep end.
I was at the public swimming pool today and decided to have a sneaky piss in the deep end. The lifeguard must have noticed – he blew his whistle so loud, I nearly fell in.
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What did one melon say after the other proposed?
What did one melon say after the other proposed? We cantaloupe!
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What did the ham say when it walked out of the hospital?
What did the ham say when it walked out of the hospital? I’m cured!
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My wife and I considered adoption
My wife and I considered adoption However, we’re not sure anyone would take our kids.
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What do you call a prawn that doesn’t want to share?
What do you call a prawn that doesn’t want to share? Shellfish
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What is your secret for staying down to earth?
What is your secret for staying down to earth? Gavity
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What genre are national anthems?
What genre are national anthems? Country lol!
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My Llama roommate yelled at me, “I’ve had enough of your dad jokes! Leave now!”
My Llama roommate yelled at me, “I’ve had enough of your dad jokes! Leave now!” “Fine,” I replied, “Alpaca my bags and leave.”
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What do you call Frosty with a 6-pack?
What do you call Frosty with a 6-pack? An abdominal snowman.
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Dad, can you explain to me what a solar eclipse is?
Dad, can you explain to me what a solar eclipse is? No Sun
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Where do you take someone who has been injured in a peekaboo accident
Where do you take someone who has been injured in a peekaboo accident? To the ICU
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What do you call an Alien with 3 eyes?
What do you call an Alien with 3 eyes? An Aliiien!
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How do you get a farm girl?
How do you get a farm girl To marry you? First a tractor
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I haven’t talked to my wife
I haven’t talked to my wife in years. I don’t want to interupr her.
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My friend gave me his Epipen
My friend gave me his Epipen while he was dying. It seemed like he really wanted me to have it.