Month: March 2024

I told my wife she was drawing her eyebrows too high. She seemed surprised.

Why don’t scientists trust atoms? Because they make up everything.

I tried to catch some fog earlier. I mist.

What do you call a fish wearing a bowtie? Sofishticated.

What did the hamburger name its baby? Patty.

I entered 10 pun contests hoping one would win. No pun in ten did.

What do you call a fake noodle? An Impasta.

I recently broke up with my alien girlfriend She’s now my Space Ex

How many psychiatrists does it take to change a light bulb? It only takes one, but it takes a long time and the light bulb has to want to change.

What’s a Karen called in Europe? An American!

I just realized my wife left me because of my obsession with simplifying fractions. Oh well. Hindsight is 1.

My wife accused me of being a cross dresser. I’m not having that, so I packed up her things and left

I’ve only got maybe two or three Motown puns left in me. Four tops!

Why can’t Luke Skywalker ever give his dad a surprise gift? Vader can always sense his presents.

What invention allows us to see through walls? Windows

Breaking news police are in pursuit of a child psychic A small medium is at large

Did you hear about the guy who invented knock knock jokes? He won a “no bell” prize.